Right now, it is at that confusing stage where it feels like I’ve just finished something big (the circus?) and now I have to move on to something else… only this time it is also after my month of no real inspiration or spark. I think I had that lull, (and now too) because I didn’t have a concept or idea behind the works I’m doing beforehand, I think it’s that excitement that drives me to make good paintings. I did do the cheeky cat painting (which I was excited by briefly) and the block painting, but right now they feel empty. I don’t think I thought about them enough, in depth. I know sometimes the meaning comes during the painting process but, I feel I need a bit more than that for my work to call out to me to work on it further. I suppose the cheeky cat painting, having the context of being a cat-in-a-hat toy to ‘entertain guests’ in wealthy families’ homes is something worth diving into. Raising the question of, are you entertained? do I bring you joy? did I make you smile? and the fact that the figure seems to me moving up the stairs but stood still for a moment to look back at you… like you said something intriguing or something you shouldn’t have.. or it felt something on you that it wants… I realize the building behind sort of looks like a japanese high school but it is ambiguous. I haven’t even finished the painting yet, even adding the stair railing in, but there are aspects of it I like, and I am scared that I’ll ruin it further as I’m trying to save it. But I guess that is the challenge of painting. You just have to keep trying until it feels right… tom said I should work on not making things muddy and have a higher contrast… like using a glaze.
After finishing the circus on tuesday, I haven’t had a chance to really think about it, the day’s been so frantic and stressful. I am glad I did it though, I can totally see us making a bigger and better circus one day. I do feel more prepared in problem solving on the spot. and the circus concept - it was a good one. I'll keep this idea in my mind.